Okay, so I appreciate that sounds like the start of a very bad joke, but bear with me…
Its hard to believe that it is already 4 years since London hosted the magnificent 2012 Olympics. This year the Games will be held in Rio. The athletes have been training for years for their events, no doubt starting to feel the pressure, putting their bodies under great physical and emotional challenges to reach peak physical fitness. This of course on the face of it has nothing to do with divorce, does it?!
So what does an Olympic athlete have in common with a person going through divorce? Well, for starters, I think some people would consider that they deserve a gold medal for getting through the challenge of their divorce. But, on a more serious note, there are in fact some real similarities AND of course some stark differences-
- This is probably the biggest challenge the person has had to face in their life so far. And in the case of divorce, most likely not wanted to be repeated.
- Both have supporters providing the person with encouragement through this challenging time. The supporters provide invaluable help to the person facing their biggest life challenge.
- There is a clear end goal. In the case of the athlete, to win the sporting event and for the divorcing person, to have the divorce process completed and behind them.
- They are both facing life changing experiences. For the athlete, to get their place in sporting history as having represented their country at the Olympic Games. For the divorce person, leaving behind their married life and entering a different phase as a newly single, independent person. Both situations can be daunting and involve a lot of responsibility.
- They both involve challenges on both mind and body for the person. There is a clear link between the physical body and the mind. Emotional stress can have a detrimental effect on the physical body, and vice versa. In both cases, great care needs to be taken with the person’s health and well-being, to put them in the best position possible to cope with the challenge ahead.
- There are strong requirements for the person to have stamina, a clear head, focus and concentration. This helps ensure the person has the energy, clarity and strength to approach their challenge in the best way possible.
- They both need a great coach! We wouldn’t expect an athlete to train without the help of a coach. Coping with divorce is no different. It is so important to get the right support and guidance from a specialised divorce coach. They provide much needed emotional support, practical help and guidance to navigate the divorcing client through this challenging time in their life.
For the reasons outlined above, getting divorced can often feel a bit like an Olympic event. There are of course, very big differences.
- In divorce the participants are not (and should never consider themselves), competitors. There are no winners and losers in divorce. The best approach to divorce involves understanding and compromise. The parties should aim to work together (perhaps with the help of their solicitors or mediator) to achieve a result which is in the best interests of both of them, and of course the children.
- Divorce is not a game. It involves people, personal feelings and big life changes for all involved. It should be taken seriously and both parties should be fair and reasonable about the other one’s requests and views.
If you have found the tips in this blog useful then you’ll find lots more in my eBooks, which you can purchase and download today.