It is not easy being the one to make the decision to get a divorce.
Deciding to divorce doesn’t make you a bad person.
Chances are you’ve taken time to come to the sad conclusion that your marriage is over.
Some of my clients tell me they’ve taken years to pluck up the courage to tell their spouse they want a divorce. They have been waiting for the “right time” to break the news and move forward.
Many people are labelled the “bad guy” in the divorce simply because it was them that made the decision. That’s unfair. It takes a lot of courage to decide to end a marriage.
There are those of course who wimp out of telling their spouse they are not happy and/or want to end the marriage and instead choose to behave really badly (with an affair and/or abusive behaviour) to push the other person to make the decision to divorce.
Other people NEED to get out of the marriage because of serious abuse by their spouse and they will need to plan a safe way to do this.
Whatever the circumstances that made the person decide on ending the marriage, often they feel guilty and responsible for “splitting up the family”. This can take its toll and make them feel really badly about themselves. The knock on effect is that they could lose confidence in themselves as well as not making strong sensible decisions in the divorce legal process.
Please know, you are not a bad person for wanting to end your marriage. You have your reasons. Get support and advice on how to navigate through the separation process, not just the legal process but your own personal journey.
If you have found the tips in this blog useful then you’ll find lots more in my eBooks, which you can purchase and download today.
If you’d like to work with me 1:1, for help preparing for your divorce/or support during or after the divorce process, please get in touch to find out how I can help.
Why I became a divorce consultant.